Stan's World - Zoning Problems
We moved to the Town of Westfield with the idea that we would stay for 10 years and then move on to the next step of our lives. We never defined that next step because 10 years is a long time, and perhaps that explains why our former 10-year plan will soon be 20 years old.
Why didn’t we move after 10 years? The reasons probably sound familiar to why so many of you stay in your homes: doctors, family, and the house fits our needs. (If you’re younger, you might also be thinking: the schools are good, and it’s an easy commute to work.) In a word, things are comfortable. Moving is an unknown; some things might be better, others less so. It’s time to take advice from Paul Simon: “Make a new plan, Stan.” (Google it…)
A few years ago, we called the building department to ask if we could build a deck over the footprint of our existing patio. The official said we can’t add more above-ground footage to what’s already built on our lot, but we’re certainly welcome to enlarge our patio.
For what it was worth, I explained the reasoning behind a deck vs a patio: We’re getting older, and we want to eliminate the steps down to the patio. We want to age in place, and steps should be avoided whenever possible. I got a sympathetic ear, but the code is what the code is, rules are rules, formulas are formulas, and the answer was still no.
The next step was a meeting with an attorney to talk about a variance. He was cautiously optimistic that we could get a variance and gave us the name of an engineer who could tell us what, if anything, we could build.
In April 2024, the engineer came out to our house to talk decks. He looked at the back yard and asked why we wanted a deck. We explained we’re growing older, we want fewer steps, yatta, yatta. He informed us that the procedure for getting approvals to build a deck is the same as for a porch. Why not just build a three-season room? Why not indeed! He was cautiously optimistic that we could get a variance and gave us the name of an architect who could draw the plans.
A few weeks later, we met with an architect about drawing up plans for a porch to be built over the footprint of our existing patio. As he looked around the backyard, he said he also was cautiously optimistic that we could get a variance.
It takes a while to draw plans. Measurements and photos are to be taken. Lots of photos. There are sketches, changes, and first and second drafts. Along the way, there were a few computational errors by the engineer and/or the architect, a few remeasurements, and more photos. Did I fail to mention invoices?
Eventually, we had a set of drawings that we could bring to our attorney so he could complete the paperwork to apply for a variance. Of course, we had to write a few more checks and sign a few forms. We were cautiously optimistic.
The town got the forms, but they required some corrections. The forms came back. Corrections were made, and the paperwork was resubmitted. After a lengthy review, we finally got a date for a hearing. But wait; the municipal official who reviewed the application found a few more errors, so the date had to be changed. These things happen.
Finally, and I mean finally, a hearing date was set for August 2025, approximately 16 months after our initial visit with the engineer. We were ready to go. We had the architect, the engineer, and the attorney. And then they added a planner because, well, I don’t know why. It didn’t matter; it was almost showtime.
On the day of our hearing, it started to rain. And rain. And rain. Streets flooded; roads were closed; arks were built. Against my wife's better judgment, I drove to the municipal building through a truly torrential downpour. I walked to the doors, only to find them locked. A woman ran from her car and told me she was the board secretary. The hearing was postponed; didn’t I get the email she sent 5 minutes ago?
I told her how long I had waited for that night, and she was very sympathetic to my plea. But board secretaries record proceedings at meetings; they don’t set the hearing agenda. She’ll get back to me.
A week later, we got a notice for a new date. Because the in-person meeting was cancelled and their next meeting was already booked, our hearing would be held virtually.
I logged in at the appointed time and dutifully sat with my notes in front of me. The board president noted that one of the cases before us was cancelled, but they had an emergency hearing for the food pantry.
During the approximately two hours of testimony and questions during the hearing for the food pantry, I perked up when I heard their presenter, a member of the clergy, note that one of the changes that was being requested was being sought so their senior volunteers wouldn’t have to walk up and down a set of steps. Who needed an attorney, an engineer, an architect, and a planner; a messenger from God was on our side!
Around 10 pm, they called our case number. When it was my turn to testify, I quoted the clergy member from the food pantry. We want to stay in our house, enjoy it, and try to keep ourselves as safe as possible. After hearing from me, the attorney, the planner, and the architect, the board unanimously agreed. (In truth, I believe it was so late they were too tired to argue.) We did it! We had a variance to build a porch!
It’s now mid-February, and the excitement from that late August night has been somewhat tempered. You see, once you have a variance, you must find a builder. And builders must review plans before they can quote a price for a project. And then the builder needs sealed drawings from the architect, and permit applications must be completed, but the paperwork isn’t always perfect, so it may have to be resubmitted. The builder finally prevailed and called to say he had the permits in hand.
But then it snowed, and the snow turned into ice. And other jobs were almost finished, but not quite. And we’re on the list. And then it snowed some more.
The other day, the builder put his sign on our snow-covered lawn. He’s either almost ready to start or he just needed a place to put an extra sign. There’s still ice and snow, but we have a sign!
April 2026 will mark two years from when this saga officially started, and who knows when it will end. (Perhaps the next Stan’s World will be a diatribe about how the builder ordered the wrong windows.) Regardless of the fate of our porch, take note that change takes time, and nobody, and I mean nobody, is on your schedule.
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